I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
