either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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