I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Randomize
