Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize