Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
you will always have a special place in my vag
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Randomize
