i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
