Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
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