It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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