She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize