Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Randomize
