I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
