To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I've blown a few things in my day
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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