On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Randomize
