Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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