So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
