that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
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