I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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