im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Randomize
