Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
