Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
