We're like a lot better than the average bears
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Randomize