Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
