this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
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