sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize