I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
