Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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