Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
