the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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