Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize