Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
