Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
