You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
