he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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