He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
