worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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