Have you finally orgasmed yet?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
