dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
