then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
