Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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