After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
So vagazzling was a success
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