shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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