Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
