A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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