Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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