Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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