he referred to my room as the tit cave...
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
