yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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