I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
