Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
My feet surprised me
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize