I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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