Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
